


Every Demon Means Every Demon

by ErnestScribler



Category: Hazbin Hotel (Web Series)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-28
Updated: 2020-12-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 19:07:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28392159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ErnestScribler/pseuds/ErnestScribler
Summary: The hotel receives an unexpected and controversial new guest.
Relationships: Charlie Magne/Vaggie
Comments: 1
Kudos: 20





	Every Demon Means Every Demon

From his apartment window, Valentino can see the burnt ruin that used to be Porn Studios. It makes him sad every time he sees it. Sad and angry. It took him a lot of work to get that studio where it was, and he had to step on a lot of necks along the way. And now he's right back where he started - that is, nowhere.

He turns to Vox, who is sitting across from him at the breakfast table. Velvet is on the couch looking at her phone. "So Vox," Val begins, "I'm thinking of rebuilding the studio. Tracking down some of the old talent. But I'd need you to float me a loan until I can get it going again. I need about -"

"Actually, Velvet and I have been talking about that," Vox breaks in.

"You have?" Val asks hopefully.

"Yeah... to be frank, Val, the studio wasn't turning much of a profit even before it was destroyed. Most of your 'talent' despises you and would do anything to avoid working with you again. And, well, you're not doing wonders for our brand identity either. Everybody knows what goes on between you and your employees. People care about that sort of thing these days, even in Hell."

"#ValentinoIsOverParty is trending on Voxtagram," pipes up Velvet in the background.

Valentino feels cold. "What... what are you saying?"

"I'm saying," replies Vox, "that you're not rebuilding the studio, and in fact, you're not going to be a part of Vox Enterprises any longer."

The eyes narrow behind the heart-shaped glasses. "You double-crossing little snake. When you first got here, when you were nobody, I was the one who had your back. And this is how you repay me?"

"Things move fast down here, Val. Not understanding that was Alastor's mistake. If you can't change with the times, you're yesterday's news." Vox claps his hands and two demons in black Voxcorp uniforms, a rhino and an elephant, appear behind him. "Security! Escort Mr. Valentino off the premises."

"No, wait!" yells Valentino as the two guards take him by the arms and carry him off. "I live here! You can't do this!"

"So long, rat," says Vox with just the faintest tinge of sadness.

***

The building is located on a side street, hard to find unless you're looking for it, a prudent measure in a town where robbers are nearly as common as customers. There is a sign out front, but a small and weathered one:

FIRST BANK OF HELL

And underneath that, in even smaller letters:

a subsidiary of Mammon LLC

Valentino steps inside and finds only one teller, a magpie demon with thick glasses. "I'd like to withdraw everything in my account," he says, handing her a slip of paper. "This is my account number and password."

The teller examines the paper, types something into her computer, and frowns. "I'm sorry, sir, that password is no longer valid," she says in her nasal voice. "It says in our records that it was changed a week ago by a Mr. Vox."

So he's been planning this for at least a week, thinks Val furiously. That little snake. There was a time when I could've scared her into giving me the money anyway, but now? She knows I'm all washed up. Probably saw the news on Vox TV this morning.

He leaves without another word, looking over his shoulder as he walks through the alley. He is suddenly, acutely aware of how many enemies he has in this town. If Alastor finds me I'm dead. If Cherri Bomb finds me I'm dead. If anyone from the studio finds me... well, maybe I could slap them around, but without my backup muscle I'm probably dead. Where am I even gonna sleep tonight? What am I gonna do?

Lost in thought, he almost walks into a streetlight. Taped to it is a flyer:

tired of an afterlife of sin?

want to change, but not sure how?

come to the

HAPPY HOTEL

and discover a whole new you

***

Angel Dust is fixing himself breakfast at the buffet in the hotel lobby. Breakfast today consists of a cup of coffee, a glass of orange juice, and an enormous cockroach that Niffty caught while cleaning the basement.

Having prepared his breakfast, he walks over to his usual table, and sees with annoyance that it's occupied. The occupant is hunched over, facing away from him. Angel puts a hand on the figure's shoulder. "Hey, buddy, do you mind -"

Valentino looks back at him.

There as a long pause. Both men look frightened. Neither speaks. Then Angel turns and runs up the stairs to Charlie's office.

***

In her office, Charlie is on the phone searching for charitable donations and potential guests. Vagatha, not extroverted enough for phone work, is sitting next to her writing letters. Suddenly the door swings open and Angel Dust bursts in.

"Guys..." he gasps, breathing hard. "Valentino's... in the lobby..."

Vagatha picks up her spear and is about to leave the office, but Charlie holds her back. "Yeah!" says Charlie brightly. "He just checked in last night! He says he's done with being a pimp. We talked about new career options for him, and he says what he really wants to do is design lighting fixtures!"

Angel takes a minute to process this. Then he laughs, trying to play off his earlier panic as if it didn't happen. "Lighting fixtures! Oh, that's just like old Val! When I was with him he had like ten lamps in his room, he'd just sit up all night staring at them, you shoulda seen it..." He trails off, still laughing. "Well, y'all be good now! Keep lickin' those envelopes!"

As he sashays out of the office and down the hall, Vagatha shuts the door behind him. Then she says to Charlie, "I wish you'd consult me before doing things like that, hon."

"Like what? Checking a new guest into the hotel?"

Vagatha sits back down next to Charlie and puts an arm around her. "You're so innocent, Charlie. I don't know how anyone stays so innocent down here. And I love that about you, but I think sometimes it affects your judgment."

"How do you mean?"

"You've never really had to deal with anyone like Valentino. I have. I've worked for guys like him, and I've been hurt by guys like him, and I can tell you that there is nothing in him worth redeeming."

"So what do you want me to do? Send him back out on the street, where he could go back to his old ways and hurt even more people?"

Vagatha stands and picks up her spear again. "No, I want you to let me go down there right now and put this in his neck. Problem solved."

Charlie sighs and is quiet for a moment. "Vaggie... when we first thought of starting this hotel, the idea behind it was that inside of EVERY demon is a rainbow. Every last one. If we start making exceptions now, we'll be undermining the whole point of the hotel."

Vagatha looks at Charlie, then at the spear, then at Charlie again. She puts the spear down. "All right. He can stay. But he stays the fuck away from Angel, and anyone else he used to work with. And if we find out about him hurting anyone else after this, even once, he is dead. Agreed?"

Charlie, not smiling for once, nods. "Agreed."

***

Angel Dust is lying on the bed of his hotel room, thinking about money. If Val really is going out of business, life for Angel will improve in a lot of ways, but he'll also be out of a job. Sure, Angel thinks to himself, the hotel covers my room and board, but Charlie isn't exactly gonna set me up with drug money. For that I'll need something else...

I know! I'll go into business for myself! I don't need Val anyway, he's just a middleman, I'm the money maker. I'll get myself one of those OnlyFiends things. I'll finally get paid what I'm worth without anyone else taking a cut!

There is a knock at the door. Angel gets up, opens it, and again finds himself face to face with Valentino. Instantly his four arms reach into four pockets and pull out four revolvers.

Valentino takes a step back and puts his hands up. "Whoa, easy, easy!"

The hands holding the guns are shaking. "What do you want?"

"I just wanted you to know I'm not with Vox and them anymore. They kicked me out of their place. Took all my money. The studio's gone, thanks to your one-eyed friend. I got nothing."

Angel frowns. "Are you tryin' to make me feel sorry for you? Because it's not gonna -"

"No, I'm just telling you that I'm not an Overlord anymore. I got no power. So you don't have to be afraid of me anymore. I thought that would make it easier - you know, for us to live in the same building. I'll leave you alone from now on. I just wanted to let you know."

Angel doesn't know what to say. Slowly, he lowers his guns, and Valentino turns and walks down the hallway. Angel watches him go. He's not wearing his hat, or his glasses or his big puffy jacket. He's trying to look less recognizable, blend in more, Angel realizes. He must be scared. He looks a lot smaller without the jacket and all. Small and pathetic.

Angel closes his door and lies back down on his bed. He's right, Angel thinks. I don't have to be afraid of him any more. I can't believe I ever was.

His pet pig climbs up on the bed and lies down next to him. He pets it absentmindedly without sitting up. "What do you think, Nugs? If a guy like Val can go legit, I'd say there's a chance for me too, huh?"

Fat Nuggets responds by grunting and scooting closer to him. And Angel Dust, for the first time in a very long time, feels safe.


End file.
